The Confiscator
Purim 5760

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Hello. My name is Mell. I am a CEO at Goldman Sachs. Some of you may know me. I like trees, skyscrapers are nice as well. Yesterday I was very very happy to walk down Amsterdam Avenue waving at all the many people. It was great, so very great that I think I'm going to do it, tomorrow again. My friend Ben is my friend. Him and I have done a lot of good things for you people and they smell great. Some of those things have not included lower prices in the caf, ethernet in the dorms, and a new speaker system in the gym. But I did do something, just ask Dov, he told me so. Before the end of the semester we have a very very great trip planned to the YU Museum. I never knew there was a museum on campus, but I really really look forward to going so very much, so very, very much.

I am M(ant)ell. Got Mell? Mell am I. I don't know...Am I Mell? Among my accomplishments is putting my name over Ben's column in every issue of the Commentator. But there is so much more to do. So very much more that there will always be so much more. To do. How do you do? I do just fine. I am Mell. It is Purim now, and in the spirit of doing the opposite, I will get out of bed.




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