Randy Modell

Candidate for Junior Class President

My name is Randy Modell and I would like to be elected for Junior Class President. I do not have much of an agenda or platform, however, neither do my opponents. Let's face it! The only reason why my opponents and I are taking the time to run for this position is because we all know that it will look good on our resumes. However, I am angry about the ridiculous prices imposed on the Yeshiva University students by the bureaucratic puppeteers who believe that they know how to manage a university cafeteria and "convenience" store. If elected, I will attempt to conquer these lowly forces which so proudly flaunt their ability to rip off Yeshiva University students.

Furthermore, I plan on organizing more interesting and fun activities than we have had in the past, perhaps even a Stern College for Women/Yeshiva College heavyweight mud wrestling tournament.

Lastly, I consider it totally inappropriate for a university's library to have such needlessly constrained hours. I will attempt to adjust its hours to fit the needs of Yeshiva students who must study on Saturday nights or later than 1 A.M. on week nights. I also hope to extend the recreational facilities' hours, to allow Yeshiva students to swim, play basketball, run on the track, or lift weights after 1 A.M. Are you always in bed at 1 A.M.?

I sincerely hope that you are seeking a Junior class president who is willing to take action, rather than one who is willing to idly sit back with his thumb up his rear, while watching Yeshiva students be abused.