Happiness is not Frivolous

To The Editor:

I enjoyed Editor Fishman's account of his life-changing experience in the woods with Noah, Jeff and Paula. It is a good story and it led the author halfway to an important truth. For the benefit of your readers, I would like to complete the journey.

Disclaimer: This letter is not about any two real people named Paula and Jeff. All I know of them is derived second-hand from Mr. Fishman's brief acquaintance which was less than 100% sober. I suspect the real Paula and Jeff died of marijuana overdoses years ago and Mr. Fishman met their spirits, which haunt the park seducing hard-working Yeshiva students away from their studies. For the sake of this letter I will assume two real people and flesh them out as my argument requires.

Mr. Fishman was impressed with the cheerful and independent lives of Paula and Jeff. He contrasted their attitude to a narrow and joyless career focus he sees among his classmates. I applaud this observation. It is not easy to live a happy life and when you come across people who are doing it, you should pay attention. If you find yourself living a life that does not make you happy, you should change something.

But there is a further step you should take. Consider where Mr. Fishman met Paula and Jeff: two days hike into Yosemite Park in near-freezing weather. They seemed carefree. But they did not get there carelessly. It took experience and preparation. A first-time hiker who started out with a walking stick and a song on his lips would look very miserable by the time he got to the valley floor. In both hiking and life, it takes hard work and skill to make it look effortless.

Now consider Paula and Jeff's life. Although they are not career-obsessed, both completed the rigorous coursework and licensing requirements to be registered nurses. They work four days and get a four-day weekend, but that requires working "shift-and-shift" during the four working days. Think about that. You wake up at 5 AM Monday morning to work the 7 AM to 3 PM shift. You get home at 4 PM, eat, do housework and grab a nap before leaving for the 11 PM to 7 AM shift. You get home exhausted from working all night, eat, fall into bed, and awaken to your 1 PM alarm to get ready for the 3 PM to 11 PM Tuesday shift. You're only one-third of the way through your four-day workweek. Yes, you finish Thursday afternoon, and don't have to go back until Tuesday morning, but you pay a price for those two extra days. RN's supervise life-and-death decisions, often in understaffed and overworked job environments. This is not the life of a careless or lazy person.

Paula and Jeff seem to have lots of friends and interests. They brew their own beer and Jeff plays in a band. Making good beer is hard, but not as hard as drinking it if it's bad. It takes lots of practice to play an instrument well, lots of work to keep a band employed and together. It even takes attention and work simply to have good friends.

Paula and Jeff got to where they are, or where I think Mr. Fishman imagines them to be, through education, careful planning and the ability to finish what they start. It takes hard work and skill to make it look effortless. There were choices made along the way as well. For example, this lifestyle does not appear to have room for children. Someone who thoughtlessly set out to imitate Paula and Jeff, without proper preparation, would crash and burn.

I said before that when you meet happy people, you should pay attention. That means you should think about how they got where they are. You will usually find education, work, planning and delayed gratification are the main ingredients. On the other hand, none of these things guarantee happiness. If you study things you are not interested in, work at drudgery, plan within narrow constraints and delay gratification pointlessly you will be miserable.

The value of meeting the Paula and Jeff's of this world is that they encourage you to set a higher standard of happiness and broaden the options you consider. Maybe you should abandon your pre-law major and look into nursing school. Maybe you should pursue hiking or home-brewing or music seriously. Maybe you should have more friends and fewer contacts. Or maybe you should just make up your mind to be happy, maybe you are doing exactly what you want but you have lost sight of why you are doing it. If you decide to be happy and devote thought and energy to the cause, you will probably succeed. If you just put one foot in front of the other while looking at the ground, you will probably end up somewhere you don't want to be.

I have one other point to make on a different subject. Mr. Fishman writes that "we shared a couple of beers" then everyone drove away. If four people shared two beers then they should be below the legal limit, but if it was two beers each, or if "a couple" means three or four each, then this might have been illegal. Even if the drivers were below the legal limit, it is foolish to drink any alcohol immediately before driving. Young drivers are four times as likely as average drivers to kill themselves and others; YU students are particularly handicapped because most never drive during the semester so their skills are rusty; YU students after "a couple" beers on a rough road in the dark do not bear thinking about.

Aaron Brown

Professor of Finance

Sy Syms School of Business

Mordechai Fishman replies:

Firstly, modern medicine has proven that no one can die of a marijuana overdose no matter the amount or potency ingested. (Department of Health and Human Services, "Marijuana and Cannaboids" pgs. 131-144 in "Drug Abuse and Drug Abuse Research - Third Triennial Report to Congress from the Secretary," 1991.)

As to Jeff and Paula and their ilk, you understand my point exactly, and eloquently state what it takes to get there. Happiness in life is something that requires effort and planning, and never did I intend to indicate otherwise. What I find pleasantly surprising is your candid recommendation to all, that if what one is doing is not making him happy a change in vocation or habit should be considered. As a student who took your vaunted Principles of Finance course I sat with many others who planned on careers in business and finance, not necessarily due to their interest in the fields, but rather, because they were in pursuit of financial success no matter what the price. While I learned about long bonds and Japanese Yen, it would have been of great benefit to hear your exhortations to happiness in class as well.

Lastly, your point about drinking and driving cannot be stressed more. We camped where Paula and Jeff had parked their truck and didn't drive any further, while only Paula drank because Jeff was driving. (We also nearly froze to death in the twenty-degree temperatures that night, neatly illustrating your point about planning and being prepared.) But you are totally correct in pointing out that alcohol, Yeshiva students, and motor vehicles is a dangerously combustible mix that should be avoided at all costs.