To the Editor:

A few points on the recent column by Ms. Hadar Weiss in the Commentator.

1) Eizehu Chacham - HaLomed Mikol Adam. Not Mikol Isha. There is a reason we make the brachah of Shelo Assani Ishah every morning.

2) There is a good reason why we Frummies won't come to the play. It is ASSUR for boys to watch girls put on a play, even if there is no singing. Is that substantial enough for you?

And a little friendly advice - the only reason you are in Stern, is to get the best possible shidduch. Boys like their wives to be aidel. Girls are supposed to be sugar, & spice, and everything nice, not bitter and confrontational. You shouldn't waste all the money your parents spent on tuition, just to get a little attention.

Shmuel Kadosh

Mesivta Yeshivas Rabbi Chaim Berlin

Hadar Weiss replies:

I thank you for your kind words in response to my column in the last issue of The Commentator. However, I do feel a need to reply in kind to your missive, if only to correct what I feel are a few misconceptions on your part.

1) In learning, the term "Ish" is used to describe a man, "Isha" a woman, and "Adam" to describe a generic anyone, either sex, that is a human being rather than an animal or a plant or some other object. Therefore my original statement of "Halomed Mikol Adam" still applies.

2) The only reason that I could think of to declare that it is "ASSUR" for men to watch women act if they do not sing, is because of Kavod HaTzibbur, the same reason that women do not receive an aliyah to the Torah in shul. Not because it is assur, but because it casts the rest of the male tzibbur in an embarrassing light for not being up to par with the woman receiving the aliyah. So, if we were to say that the men at Yeshiva University were not up to par with the women, then perhaps because of Kavod HaTzibbur we would not be permitted to attend. Paradoxically, this would mean that since you do not believe that the guys have anything to learn from the girls, you actually could attend, as Kavod HaTzibbur does not stop you. Yet I, if not for the fact that I find Kavod HaTzibbur utterly inapplicable here, would have a problem attending the Stern play, as I believe the guys do have a lot to learn from the women. By making such a bold declaration that it is "ASSUR" for us to watch women perform, you almost force me to liken you to a chassid shoteh that is machariv haolam, delaying the coming of Mashiach by increasing sinat chinam, if I would care to go to the extremes that you do. Thankfully I do not, so don't worry, you aren't responsible for our remaining in galut. But your misinterpretation of halakha and halakhic terminology does lead you to a misinterpretation in thought.

As to your last point, that I am enrolled in Stern College only to find a shidduch and I should be aidel and sugar and spice,.etcetera, I can only laugh. As I clearly signed that column Yeshiva College '00, and I referred to the guys up here as "us guys" repeatedly, I do not understand how you could believe that I attended Stern, but I'm willing to overlook it.

Thanks again for the quick response, and, I must add, the entertainment: being 6'5" and not shaving for sefirah, I don't usually get called Ms. Weiss.